Comments on: You Asked For It: The Formal Fall Wedding Guest

By: MAQUILLAGE

MAQUILLAGE — Thu, 24 Jul 2008 23:30:57 +0000

J’ai trouv

By: ratita

ratita — Mon, 05 Nov 2007 15:54:10 +0000

I will never understand the obsession with tanning. I wish I had really fair skin, I just think is beautiful, especially the dark-haired fair-skin combo. I guess is cultural, where I come from all of us would like that. Again, it probably is another case of wanting what you can’t have…not saying I don’t appreciate darker skin tones though! It’s just like having curly or straight hair. Both are pretty! But I think people should not obsess with trying to change what was given to them instead of making an effort (and putting all that energy) to make it the best they can.

By: The Manolo Week in Review » Manolo's Shoe Blog: Shoes, Fashion, Celebrity, and Manolo!

Sat, 03 Nov 2007 16:10:55 +0000

[...] Plumcake… Ah the formal wedding. Those magical evenings when you get to trade your personal sanity, comfort and an expensive share in a 6 quart Kitchenaid Artisan Pro mixer for four hours of clumsy small talk, a feeble breast grope by an inappropriate member of the groom’s family (bonus points if he was born before the New Deal or has to carry an oxygen tank) and all the hangover-inducing champagne you can drink. [...]

By: succubus

succubus — Fri, 02 Nov 2007 23:28:39 +0000

I was always taught that one does NOT wear unbroken black or white to a wedding.

By: Plumcake

Plumcake — Fri, 02 Nov 2007 13:56:34 +0000

AND apropos of absolutely nothing, let me plug my internet friend Jen's hilarious book Bitter is the New Black.

By: Toby Wollin

Toby Wollin — Fri, 02 Nov 2007 13:15:03 +0000

scsee – I’m with you on the whole issue of wearing black. My eldest was married early last month on a very nice Sunday afternoon. I would venture to guess that at least 1/3 of the female guests wore black. My SISTER even wore black. I think it is not only laziness, but also “fashion wimpiness” akin to the remarks made by a former co-worker who always wore black, “I go out drinking every night and don’t want to have to make clothing choices when I’m hung over.” I see that in the whole “New York Women All Wear Black” thing – it’s easy; it’s fast; it takes absolutely no talent for coordination or color matching or anything else. Just reach into the closet and pull something out. I know a lot of women in New York think that wearing black is very “Frenchified” and chic and all of that, but to me, when I am in New York and see this ocean of black everywhere, it makes me think of their wearing this uniform that actually does not flatter many. But, it IS easy and for a lot of women who don’t have much fashion confidence, I guess it works.

By: Allison

Allison — Fri, 02 Nov 2007 13:10:22 +0000

scsee, I think black at weddings is fine, but being very fair and blonde (which I didn’t tell Plumcake), I may go with another color just to avoid looking washed out. But I loved the advice to get a simple dress with great accessories; that’s going to work out well for my wardrobe and my budget.

By: Cat

Cat — Fri, 02 Nov 2007 02:49:53 +0000

I have green eyes, dark hair, and very, very fair skin. I’ve always gotten comments like, “You need to get some sun,” “You’re whiter than a ghost,” “Your skin is blinding me,” etc. I’ve also been called a vampire, Wednesday Addams, Casper, etc. It doesn’t really bother me, but La BellaDonna has a good point about the double standard in making disparaging comments about the paleness of the fair-skinned when it is certainly not socially acceptable to make disparaging comments about the darkness of the dark-skinned. But, like teteatete, I just chalk it up to ignorance and shrug it off. There have been plenty of beautiful, super fantastic, fair-skinned women throughout history, and I’m not going to let some ignorant comments damage my self-esteem.

By: scsee

scsee — Fri, 02 Nov 2007 01:37:20 +0000

Please, please….no black at weddings. Fall, evening, formal, any of the above. I think it’s just kind of lazy and inappropriate. People will say no, rules have changed, it doesn’t matter, but yeah. It kind of does. If you’re shopping for a new dress, make the effort, find something in a lovely color other than black to celebrate your friend’s new phase of life.

By: teteatete

teteatete — Thu, 01 Nov 2007 23:12:15 +0000

I admit I didn’t think about the angle that Plumcake has suggested–looking too sexy at a wedding. It makes perfect sense now. I don’t have black hair (I wish!) but I have very pale skin, and I know that some reds look absolutely atrocious on me and it has taken me many trips back to Nordstroms to get one that I think flatters my skin and doesn’t wash me out.

When my Mom moved here when she married my Dad (she’s English), my grandmother apparently looked at her, astonished, and said, “My dear you are the absolute whitest person I have ever seen.” She didn’t mean it in an insensitive way, she was just truly amazed at the whiteness. Being cruel and yelling “get a tan” is just plain rude. It’s understandable to be sensitive when people say mean things, but I think a better response than getting up-in-arms is to take it more stride…after all, it’s just a lip-stick shade! Over the years I’ve been asked if I was going to be served up at Thanksgiving like a Butterball turkey. Be superfantastic despite what ignorant vitriol the nay-sayers spew.