Manolo for the Big Girl Fashion, Lifestyle, and Humor for the Plus Sized Woman.

January 27, 2008

Twistie’s Sunday Caption Madness

Filed under: Uncategorized — Twistie @ 12:37 pm

Yes, folks, it’s time for another round of Twistie’s Sunday Caption Madness! Last time, you guys completely outdid yourselves. Let’s see how you do this time.

For those of you new to the space, here’s how it works: I post a picture, you reply to this post with your funniest caption for the pic, and next saturday, I announce a winner. So here we go!

Prada Plus Ready…set…snark!


  1. “And now, for the discriminating zombie, we have our ‘Pattern Madness’ line! Now you too can distract your victims with eye-bleeding patterns while you feast on their brains!”

    Comment by Cat — January 27, 2008 @ 2:01 pm

  2. “They can make me wear it, but they can’t make me like it!”

    Comment by TropicalChrome — January 27, 2008 @ 3:29 pm

  3. Amanda declares her ez screw on/off head the accessory she loves the most.

    Comment by Phyllis — January 27, 2008 @ 4:40 pm

  4. “Love doing the Sunday crossword? Why not wear display your spelling chops proudly and wear it? What does that spell? Six across, S-T-Y-L-I-S-H!”

    Comment by Margo — January 27, 2008 @ 4:44 pm

  5. “I’m… too sexy for this…tablecloth! What rhymes with tablecloth?!?!?!”

    Comment by dowdydiva — January 27, 2008 @ 5:47 pm

  6. Checks *can* work with plaid, it’s true, but visible titties? . . . NEVER!!!

    Comment by Meg Q — January 27, 2008 @ 8:36 pm

  7. Who needs hips when you have giant pockets to fake them with?

    Comment by Lisa — January 27, 2008 @ 8:55 pm

  8. What the most discriminating undead will be wearing this spring!

    Comment by deja pseu — January 27, 2008 @ 9:49 pm

  9. 1. The only problem with Senior Year Home Ec sewing classes was that they actually expected you to wear the clothes you made in order to pass. This earned it the name Home Yeccchhh!

    2. Damn that salesgirl! She said these shoes would be perfect with this outfit.

    3. Maybe if I can get my nipples stick out far enough, no one will notice the rest of this get up.

    Comment by gemdiva — January 27, 2008 @ 9:53 pm

  10. Welcome to Fashion week at the Salvation Army Thrift Store!

    Comment by gemdiva — January 27, 2008 @ 9:54 pm

  11. Clarice was so mesmerized by the pattern of her skirt that she walked right into a brick wall, giving herself two black eyes and a fat lip.

    Comment by deja pseu — January 27, 2008 @ 9:58 pm

  12. Zombie Checklist:
    Blank stare? Check.
    Lumbering gait? Check.
    Atrophied fashion sense? Check.

    Comment by SaraDarling — January 27, 2008 @ 10:31 pm

  13. The newest resort wear line from Prada: the “My Apartment Was On Fire When I Got Dressed This Morning” collection, available in stores now!!!

    Comment by Evangeline — January 27, 2008 @ 11:59 pm

  14. Ashley used Home Ec class to punish her mother for not taking her to Hot Topic.

    Comment by HULK — January 28, 2008 @ 12:12 am

  15. Cue the smaltzy music… Scene bakery… Announcer speaks… “My friends, The results of carb deprivation can be devasting. Sunken eyes, protruding Jolie lips, inability to dress oneself. If you know of anyone like this, please, immediately take them to your nearest bakery or Italian restaraunt. Or send a check to the Carb Deprivation Council (CDC)…Your donation could save a model or celebrity. Only you can help. Won’t you?” Fade into a screen filled with the blacken hollow eye……..

    Comment by Jennie — January 28, 2008 @ 12:22 am

  16. It wasn’t so much the horrific outfit, it wasn’t so much the shoes that pinched and didn’t go with anything else, it wasn’t even the mandatory nipple icing; what really pissed Natalia off was the fact that the designer had took her seriously when her response to his demands she lose more weight was “Well then cut off my head before you weigh me and then slap it back on for the runway!”

    Comment by Babs — January 28, 2008 @ 12:52 am

  17. What do you mean you didn’t notice my tights! They are what tie the outfit together!

    Comment by Amanda — January 28, 2008 @ 2:01 am

  18. Maybe if I hadn’t spent $3000 on this skirt, I could have afforded a bra.

    Comment by Smark — January 28, 2008 @ 12:58 pm

  19. Despite all her efforts, Camilla’s nipples insisted on being perky.

    Comment by Toddson — January 28, 2008 @ 1:26 pm

  20. Dang! I hate it when my plaids don’t match.

    Comment by queenofalot1 — January 28, 2008 @ 2:07 pm

  21. Glenda was furious when they told her she had to use the “Big Girl Arrow.”

    Comment by Sass — January 28, 2008 @ 2:18 pm

  22. When Andrea looked up fierce in the dictionary she could not decide whether to go “violently hostile” or “extremely vexed” so she did both.

    Comment by Rayne of Terror — January 28, 2008 @ 5:05 pm

  23. Next up from George Romero….Picnic of the Dead!

    Comment by AmazonAngelle — January 28, 2008 @ 5:17 pm

  24. Sleep Deprived Farm Chic is the new Heroin Chic!

    Comment by Nony Mouse — January 28, 2008 @ 5:48 pm

  25. The next person to say, “Cheer up, it could be worse!” gets it in the fucking neck.

    Comment by Gingembre — January 28, 2008 @ 6:44 pm

  26. This is the last time I let a colorblind magpie style my clothes, and a racoon do my makeup.

    Comment by Dowdydiva — January 28, 2008 @ 7:03 pm

  27. “My designer went to Fashion Week and all I got was this lousy … this lousy … okay, what the hell AM I wearing here? Man, I gotta get off the smack.”

    Comment by Despina — January 28, 2008 @ 10:59 pm

  28. They all thought she was upset about the clothing, but what they didn’t know was that as soon as the dresser removed the neckcloth, her head fell off.

    Comment by megaera — January 29, 2008 @ 5:17 am

  29. Contrary to my nipples, me so sad.

    Comment by Lisa — January 29, 2008 @ 10:04 am

  30. Unfortunately, Wal-Mart was all out of plaid bras.

    Comment by slownews — January 29, 2008 @ 11:39 am

  31. Ludmillia’s plan for male mind control:
    Look into my eyes, looook into my eyyeeees….
    Look at my skirt, loooook at my skiiiiiirt….
    Still no?
    See through my blouse, seeeeeee through my blooooouse….

    Comment by Nessje — January 29, 2008 @ 11:45 am

  32. Miss Scarlett was told to leave her mothers fine linens alone after she had destoyed the lovely velvet drapes. Then she whacked her sister to make sure she wouldn’t be at all pretty when Mr. Kennedy came calling.

    Comment by Miss Louisa — January 30, 2008 @ 1:40 am

  33. Mad for plaid! That explains the angry face.

    Comment by StevenIga — January 30, 2008 @ 12:41 pm

  34. Unfortunately Maria ran out of the Von Trapp’s curtains and had to fashion a top from an Italian tablecloth. Lisette decided to glower instead of singing.

    Comment by rj — January 30, 2008 @ 8:15 pm

  35. “When I find out who stole my laxatives!!”

    Comment by Carrie — February 1, 2008 @ 4:46 am

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