Manolo for the Big Girl Fashion, Lifestyle, and Humor for the Plus Sized Woman.

September 8, 2008

The Horror, The Horror.

Filed under: Uncategorized — Miss Plumcake @ 12:55 pm

Before you look at the boots I’m about to post, I will say to you the same thing I told Mrs Reisweig in the third grade: “I swear to you, I am not drunk.”

It’s just that sometimes a girl can have a hard week before it’s even Monday. Like maybe the gorgeous Liam Neeson looking dude who kept flirting with you turns out to be MARRIED and a CALVINIST* and a VEGAN and you go home and you get online only to find an instant message from a guy you broke up with months ago because apparently his one goal in life was to give everyone in the greater Austin area the syph and you wanted to get out before you became part of Tuskegee 90210 and you CANNOT find your other black Armani corderie d’orsay even though they were both right there this morning and that means tomorrow you’re going to have to wear your stupid Kate Spade slingbacks like an animal and OGODWHYISLIFESOHARD???

So it’s not surprising that a girl’s head can be turned by something a little out of the ordinary.

Like these from *shudder* L.A.M.B. and Marc Jacobs.

LAMB BootieMarc Jacobs

God, I’m so ashamed.

*I heart my Calvinist readers. You rock on with your Jesus Thimbles!


  1. Oh my sweet, sweet Miss Cake. It’s ok. ::pats back soothingly, hands over gin:: Don’t worry, we all go through that phase. For me, it was driving moc’s and matching bowling bag purses. Please don’t ask.

    Comment by Leah — September 8, 2008 @ 1:11 pm

  2. LOL, this Calvinist is not offended but is in fact wondering what a Jesus Thimble is. Those Marc Jacobs are quite intriguing in a disturbing, “No, I really couldn’t” way.

    Comment by KES — September 8, 2008 @ 6:19 pm

  3. I think this calls for serious detox…go buy those Max Kirbidan shoes IMMEDIATELY.

    Comment by Christine — September 8, 2008 @ 7:16 pm

  4. Honey, if you’re liking those shoes, you’re already suffering from advanced neurosyphillis. Sorry to have to tell you like this, but maybe I can save you from the next step: Fringed leather jacket with batwing sleeves.

    Comment by Jo — September 8, 2008 @ 8:08 pm

  5. Jesus Thimble = those teensy tiny cups into which Your People put grapejuice to take Communion.

    Comment by Plumcake — September 8, 2008 @ 8:09 pm

  6. It’s a testament to the day I had explaining to Brazil that no, really, hurricanes in the Caribbean delay cargo ships leaving Miami and Jacksonville that I have a serious hunger for those Marc Jacobs boots – and I have just the skirt.

    Comment by Whitney — September 8, 2008 @ 9:21 pm

  7. “and you CANNOT find your other black Armani corderie d’orsay even though they were both right there this morning and that means tomorrow you’re going to have to wear your stupid Kate Spade sling backs like an animal”

    This made me laugh so hard! Thank you, Plumcake!

    Comment by Cat — September 8, 2008 @ 9:27 pm

  8. Ok, I rather like the LAMB’s. I’d like them even better if they were some other color than old-mustard yellow, and if they weren’t peep-toes (I hate peep-toes. I especially hate peep-toe *boots*.) In a rich, bright red, for example, they would display the level of wholehearted commitment to over-the-top absurdity that is necessary for “absurd” to succeed. But neither the yellow nor the black is quite there. And I think that I’ve established that I have rather … theatrical … taste.

    Comment by rabrab — September 8, 2008 @ 10:20 pm

  9. darling, you are not well.

    Comment by Violet — September 8, 2008 @ 11:08 pm

  10. Wait….is that sheer metallic mesh?!? Make it not be true!!

    Comment by jennifer — September 8, 2008 @ 11:19 pm

  11. The LAMBs might be alright if you were trying to match your ca 1902 Shingle style Queen Anne manor house. Why exactly one would want to do so escapes me, but it was the first thing that I thought of when I saw those boots. Man, they’re hideous… :)

    Comment by Kathy — September 9, 2008 @ 12:00 am

  12. Marc Jacobs is clearly a closeted Goth. One of my people!

    Comment by raincoaster — September 9, 2008 @ 3:25 am

  13. Oh, my retinas!

    Comment by Sashibala — September 9, 2008 @ 7:58 am

  14. Rain, I don’t think Marc Jacobs is a *closeted* anything.

    Comment by Plumcake — September 9, 2008 @ 3:09 pm

  15. LOVE it when plumcake drinks the frogwater.

    Comment by marjorie — September 9, 2008 @ 3:16 pm

  16. HAHA! Just clicked on the MJ boots to get a closer look, and read the first line of the description:

    “Immortalize your image with these bewitchingly beautiful boots from Marc by Marc Jacobs. ”

    heehee… heee…. Very creative, Mr. or Ms. PR Copyeditor. Nice work.

    Comment by Leah — September 9, 2008 @ 3:45 pm

  17. I actually like the LAMB boot-lets! They are bizarre and I don’t see how anyone would take them seriously, but think they’d be fun to wear.

    Comment by Catherine — September 9, 2008 @ 8:52 pm

  18. Between the shoes and the Jesus thimble I am just speechless…

    Comment by AmazonAngelle — September 10, 2008 @ 1:33 am

  19. I agree with Amazon. Pass me a jesus thimble of frogwater!

    Comment by SusanC — September 10, 2008 @ 12:54 pm

  20. I was entranced by the Marc Jacob boots earlier this month. Then I realized I could get the exact same look with a pair of pumps and a set of fishnet knee highs.

    Comment by maatnofret — September 15, 2008 @ 3:16 am

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