First of all, I’m pretty sure I would never eat any of this stuff. Okay, I say that while eating tortilla chips at 9 in the morning out of the sack lunch my bartender lovingly packed for me last night (thanks Aaron! Love the litchi-infused vodka) but I’m pretty sure I mean it. I’ve never been one for fair food.
Also I don’t like fairs. Aside from my inherent dislike of people experiencing happiness, once I got lost at the Montgomery County Fair when I was a kid and even though the nice police officers gave me an ice cream in the shape of a frog (according to Doctor Google it was a Good Humor “Fat Frog” but there’s no picture) I had a scary incident where I got too close to some enormous pigs and well…let’s just say I eat bacon out of vengeance now. Delicious, bacon-flavored vengeance.
That being said, I am immeasurably proud to live in a state where the most boring, healthy thing on the menu is chicken-fried bacon. I can’t feel my left arm, but I’m proud.
Deep-fried props to my pal Bingo (who isn’t even IN Texas) for cluing me in.
Chicken Fried Bacon – Thick and peppery Farm Pac® bacon is seasoned, double-dipped in a special batter and breading and deep-fried. Served with a creamy side of ranch or honey mustard sauce. Served at N30 located on Nimitz at MLK. Winner of Best Taste in the Big Tex Choice Awards competition.
Fried Banana Split – A mixture of banana and honey peanut butter is rolled in balls, battered and deep-fried and topped with assorted, delicious fixings, including powdered sugar, caramel and chocolate syrups, chopped peanuts, whipped cream and banana split flavored ice cream bites then fittingly crowned with the traditional cherry. Winner of Most Creative in the Big Tex Choice Awards competition.
Fernie’s All-American Fried Grilled Cheese Sandwich – An American classic with a State Fair twist. Two slices of white bread filled with a blend of American and cheddar cheeses, dipped in an egg and milk batter and lightly coated with panko bread crumbs for extra crispness. Served with a side of shoestring potato sticks, a pickle spear and tomato soup dipping sauce. The All American Meal! S Finalist in the Big Tex Choice Awards competition.
Texas Fried Jelly Belly Beans – Jelly Belly Beans are rolled in funnel cake batter and fried to a crunch. People can share the treat with friends and try to guess the flavors before biting down.Finalist in the Big Tex Choice Awards competition.
Deep Fried S’mores – Marshmallow cream and chocolate chips are sandwiched between two graham crackers, dipped in a feather-light batter and fried to a golden brown. The campfire-inspired treats are dusted in powdered sugar. Finalist in the Big Tex Choice Awards competition.
Fire & Ice – A pineapple ring is battered and deep-fried, then topped with banana-flavored whipped cream that’s been frozen in liquid nitrogen. The smoking concoction is ladled with strawberries and syrup. Finalist in the Big Tex Choice Awards competition.
Fried Chocolate Truffles – A silky-smooth, handmade, dark chocolate truffle is rolled in cocoa powder before being battered and deep-fried. The melting chocolate goodness is dusted in cinnamon, sugar and cocoa powder. Finalist in the Big Tex Choice Awards competition.
Chocolate-Covered Strawberry Waffle Balls – Plump fresh strawberries covered in a thick chocolate shell are dipped in a sweet, waffle batter and deep-fried. Dusted with powdered sugar and served on a stick. Finalist in the Big Tex Choice Awards competition.
Fried Pop Rocks Fundae Blast – Ignite your senses with this explosion of Tastes. Fried Ice Cream covered in Hershey’s Syrup and Pop Rocks. Your fuse is a Twizzler rolled in Pop Rocks. While you disarm it, you’ll find an Atomic Fireball inside . . .“Fire in the Bowl”! Stand FW-22 located on Fun Way across from Lost Children Building. (omg, nightmares)
Fried Dinner Roll – A savory dinner roll lusciously filled with cream cheese and covered with a sweet batter, placed on a stick and deep fried to perfection.
Fried Apple iPie – A warm, delicious crispy fried apple pie with just a hint of cinnamon, is smothered in rich vanilla ice cream and topped with an edible iPod “like” mp3 player and whipped cream. Real working souvenir “ear-bud” earphones complete this tasty iPie experience!
Eat up, y’all!