So it’s January.
January, well, blows. The holidays are over, you’ve got a cold, the hangover you’ve been hair-of-the-dogging since Thanksgiving is finally coming home to roost, the grocery store’s stopped carrying peppermint ice cream and you’ve got a stack of thank-you notes that need writing.
It strikes you in the middle of a masterfully composed note to dear Aunt Alberta, whose *delightful* oinking fridge alarm was thrown at astounding speed into the trash immediately upon opening: you feel uncool.
There is nothing worse than feeling uncool. I mean, uh, not that I know what feeling uncool is like since we all know I wasn’t born from mother’s womb like normal mortals, but instead emerged fully formed from Lou Reed’s guitar, smoking Gauloises and listening to Nina Simone.
BUT
If I DID ever feel uncool, WHICH I DON’T (not even when my answer to the relatively simple question of “are you okay” by a Cute Boy is a plaintive “I’m covered in jam”) all I would have to do is step outside and put on these:
The original Ray-Ban Wayfarer sunglasses.
You just can’t argue with this level of cool. It’s unassailable.
The original Wayfarer transcends age and time. A 15 year-old boy is cool in them, a 70 year-old lady is cool in them. It’s like a riddle. How much more cool could they be? And the answer is none. None more cool.
They were cool when Audrey Hepburn wore them in Breakfast at Tiffany’s and Andy Warhol wore them to the Factory.
They were cool when Jack Kennedy went sailing
and they were cool when Bob Dylan went electric.
And they’d be cool on you.
I have tortoiseshell ones. And yes, they are very cool.
Comment by Style Spy — January 10, 2009 @ 1:22 am
Alas! I believe I am the exception to the rule. I tried on a pair once and looked like a massive, massive geek…and not the kind I sort of enjoy being, either. I looked like a geek trying way too hard to be cool instead of a geek who is out loud and proud about her geekier aspects.
I did, however, find a pair of sunglasses that bring out my inner Audrey to a superfantastic degree. Oddly enough, they look a lot like rounder tortoiseshell RayBans. Even more oddly, I found them in a drug store for a cool fifteen bucks.
Comment by Twistie — January 10, 2009 @ 12:31 pm
I have a pair of Ray Bans and wear them EVERYWHERE! I love them to bits.
If they’re cool enough for Andy Warhol then they’re cool enough for you.
Comment by Deborah — January 10, 2009 @ 6:24 pm
Are clip-ons ever cool? Or would the Manolosphere advocate the saving of the monies and the purchasing of the prescription sunglasses?
Comment by TeleriB — January 11, 2009 @ 7:21 am
I think Audrey is actually wearing Ray-Bans Cats 1000. And the lenses on Andy’s aren’t square enough to be Wayfarers, but I can’t tell what they are. Still very cool, though.
Comment by Megan — January 11, 2009 @ 3:08 pm
I can’t quibble with the sunglasses – I saved up for a prescription pair last year, and I love them. They also happen to be Ray-Bans (though a different shape than these). What I quibble with is adding smoking french cigarettes to your list of things that would make you cooler.
I’m sorry, but the smoking of cigarettes – even if they are french – does not contribute to anyone’s coolness. Wrinkles, yellow teeth, that SMELL, and…wait for it…lung cancer…all absolutely not superfantastic.
Comment by jen209 — January 12, 2009 @ 11:12 am
Really? Smoking causes cancer? I had NO IDEA. Thank you so much!
I don’t smoke, have never smoked and was in the room when my beloved grandfather -who didn’t smoke either– died of lung cancer, which I’m sure had more than a little something to do with the fact that he lived with my three pack-a-day grandmother for 50 years.
The cultural association of Gauloises is the cliche of cool. Serge Gainsbourg’s song, Jim Jarmusch’s films. This is a..wait for it…humor blog. Calm down.
Comment by Plumcake — January 12, 2009 @ 12:07 pm
Totally calm. Just expressing my opinion that smoking would not be on my list of cool things. Not starting a blog comment war.
Comment by jen209 — January 12, 2009 @ 12:25 pm
Hey girl!
Lovely post! You are so right about trying to stay and keep the cool factor while bundling up in amazingly freezing temperatures!
Keep it Curvy!
Comment by Marie Denee — January 12, 2009 @ 2:57 pm
Ok- My 15 year old was begging for a pair of Wayfarers when we went to NYC for the Rockefeller Center Tree tour. When I told her that I begged for a pair of Wayfarers for my Christmas when I was 15- way back in the 80’s- she was shocked- and then when my older husband said he had a pair in college way way back in the 60’s she just looked at us with disbelief. It took her a while, but, get this ladies, she came back and said maybe I was right about saving up for the classics because then you are always in style. Score one for the classics. I think the child we be getting a pair of these for her 16th birthday- I may just have to pick up a par for myself while I am at it.
Comment by Kimiks — January 14, 2009 @ 12:57 am
Wayfarers – cool enough to be in a Don Henley song in 1984 and the Ataris remake in 2003.
Comment by AmelieWannabe — January 16, 2009 @ 11:45 am
there is a time and a place for it.: “Manolo for the Big Girl!”. Just added you to my feed reader I’ll be back ~sunglasses
Comment by Sunglasses — February 4, 2009 @ 9:39 am