This special-themed Monday Hotness goes out to superfantastic fans Trinity and Glenly.
As you might have read if you’re following me on twitter (as I’m sure you are) I couldn’t decide on last week’s Monday Hotness because I was torn between “Geeks We Love” and “80’s Crushes”so I didn’t do one at all and cruelly, CRUELLY deprived you of your much-needed hotness.
This week, I’m feeling a bit nostalgic so I think we’ll go with a special variation of 80’s Crushes. Today I give you
Plumcake’s First Five Musical Crushes
(in chronological order)
Peter Tork: The Geekiest Monkee.
Ya’ll, I loved this boy so much. I used to watch reruns of The Monkees when I was a little girl and goofy, geeky Peter totally did it for my second-grade self. So much so that I had a massive crush on a girl named Laura who looked (and in my defense, still does) just exactly like Peter. As a note I would like to add that that was the second most gratifying thing that’s ever happened to me on Facebook. The first was, of course, discovering that January who was a total Mean Girl to me in 6th grade can now best be described in the words “Hot Tranny Mess.” GOD I love the internet.
There is not a straight girl or gay man this side of slap bracelets who didn’t have an EPIC crush on Morten Harket a.k.a. That Guy from The A-Ha Video.
His mullet was a masterpiece, he rocked the mom jeans
but how do we love him best?
as the dreamy, sensitive rotoscoped biker from the Take On Me video.
Remember how I said “don’t judge me?”
Ahem. Well. Yes. Quite.
I think the less we say about this the better. Moving on, shall we?
The great and over-riding love of my middle school life was, of course, one Mister Wolfgang Axl Rose. My father had kittens every time I mentioned his name and I’m sure was convinced he would eventually lose his well-bred only daughter to some lizard-looking dude with questionable tattoos, a penchant for cheap beer and probably several strains of antibiotic-resistant VD.
(Still. He WAS kinda cute.)
Finally –and I stand by this one to this day– I give you Henry Lawrence Garfield, better known as Henry Rollins.
I’ve seen him out and about a few times when I’m in D.C., in fact we stayed at the same hotel in Richmond the last time I did a face to face, and he’s my best friend Joey’s hero. Me? I think he’s extra-hot and extra-smart but perhaps a bit intense for every day use.
Of course there’s the time I got put on suicide watch my freshman year of college because I painted the quote “Scar Tissue is Stronger Than Muscle Tissue” on my loft bunk, which I found hilarious, and there’s always the time at the Girl Scout slumber party where I had Liz D. try to recreate Rollins’ most famous tattoo on my back.
It was not a success.