Y’all. Seriously now. This has been like the Worst Two Weeks ever and the only thing that has remotely cheered me up is that a girl who was really epically horrid to me for no reason got what may actually be the worst color job I’ve ever seen in my 29 and a half years of life (and that includes the oh-too-apropos Bride of Frankenstein highlights my mother got the week before she married my least favorite of her husbands which to this day sends me into peals of Uncharitable Laughter because that’s the sort of karmic retribution the Fashion Universe gives when you put your fat teenage daughter in a seafoam green sailor suit with floppy lace bow and enormous printed peonies) so I mean, that was kinda gratifying, and I did end up snagging a bottle of my favorite effortless summer perfume —Diptyque’s l’Ombre Dans l’Eau; a gorgeous explosion of crushed green leaves, black currant leaf and berry and a breath of Damask rose– for pretty much half price, but other than that it’s been All Suck All The Time, and I’m just over it.
So today’s Monday Hotness is going to be the equivalent of comfort food. No rhyme nor reason, just my one of my favorites because mama needs a break, and that break needs to involve Kenneth Branagh.
I don’t think there are words to properly express my love for Kenneth Branagh, but I’d been hesitant to use him as a Monday Hotness before because every time I google, this ONE picture will come up where he kinda sorta looks like my dad and then that just ruins the whole thing for me.
I know for most of you, your favorite KB is either Hamlet:
(it’s my favorite Hamlet but not my favorite Hotness.)
or as Benedick in Much Ado About Nothing which was just chock FULL of unrepentant hotness, vis:
(and look at how cute Kate Beckinswhatever was before all her plastic surgery! There was nothing wrong with your nose Kate!)
and of course < we must mention this:
ahem. yes…well.
but my favorite Branagh is just Branagh about town. A little pudgy, a little ginger, happy, crinkly and generally way more adorable than someone of his brilliant nature really ought to be.
Sigh.
dude, i am so with you on this one. so much is about his VOICE for me — it often sounds as tho it has a laugh in it, and so deliciously mellifluous. he makes shakespeare as conversational and comprehensible and current-sounding as if it were written yesterday. LURV.
one of my fave underrated movies is Dead Again, with him and then-wife emma thompson. so twisty and old-school and suspenseful and playful.
and how funny was he as gilderoy lockhart in that harry potter movie?
Comment by marjorie — May 4, 2009 @ 4:25 pm
Unfortunately, I can’t ever find him truly hot, because he cheated on my #1 Girlcrush Emma Thompson. You DON’T cross Emma Thompson.
Comment by harveypenguin — May 4, 2009 @ 5:01 pm
Penguin, I am with you on this. I lurved KB until he cheated on Emma and then he was off my List totally.
Comment by class factotum — May 4, 2009 @ 5:57 pm
I still love KB, he is just lurvely, but I totally agree that Emma is the best.
Comment by Icy — May 4, 2009 @ 6:55 pm
I’m just glad the Monday Hotness is back!
Comment by Mrs. Hendricks — May 5, 2009 @ 9:24 am
Sorry for your troubles, but if it brings us the lovely Mr. Branagh I say Bring It On!
Comment by Carol — May 5, 2009 @ 9:44 am
I had a huge crush on him when I was thirteen or so because of “Dead Again” (terrible American accent and all). This was happy-making. I do have to say that I’m with everyone else on the whole cheating-on-the-awesome-Emma thing. Bad move there, but it seems to have worked out ok. I doubt that being married to Greg Wise could be too painful.
Comment by Jennifer — May 5, 2009 @ 6:46 pm
I too love KB, and especially Dead Again; I too was Not Happy about the cheating on Emma – but the truth is, we don’t know what is in everyone’s marriage (and, probably, thank Jeebus for that). I’m pretty firmly in the Judge Not Lest Ye Yourself Be Judged camp, these days. And I also think if we put all entertainers through a Morals test, and boycotted them when they didn’t agree with us, we’d all be at home playing cats’ cradle, because we don’t even always agree with one another!
Comment by La BellaDonna — May 8, 2009 @ 8:17 am