I decided to go grocery shopping at 2:00 in the morning last night (huh?). This in and of itself is not extremely strange as I prefer to get my groceries when the risk of running into children is low, lest we have an an unfortunate recurrence of that time those kids played tag using me as a base and I’m forced out of civic duty to drown them for the betterment of all mankind.
Plus I almost always run into a door guy or bartender I know, standing in line to purchase his single roll of toilet paper, some grapes and three pounds of string cheese. It’s good times and not at all unusual. It is unusual, however, for me to go grocery shopping at 2:00 a.m. after I’d lost a good deal of blood.
Yesterday, for various reasons that don’t bear repeating, my veins were temporarily turned into the Bellagio fountains which resulted in a less-than-ideal quantity of my own supply of vampire juice escaping its bodily confines.
I was fine and after I got stopped or staunched or whatever they call it I went home happy as a lark and took what can only be described as the most bitchin’ six-hour nap in the history of six-hour naps. It was a nap for the ages.
I woke around 1:30 and after playing two woefully inept games of mah jongg against myself decided I really needed some Mexican food, but the only place that was open was La Mexicana Bakery and they haven’t liked me since that time I Was Not At My Best and thought I was ordering in Spanish –which I actually speak quite beautifully– but ended up ordering in French and then when they didn’t understand I just ordered in French LOUDER.
Anyhoodle, going grocery shopping after losing a lot of blood is not something I’d recommend and my haul, upon opening my refrigerator this morning, was what I’d charitably call “eccentric”. There’s some sort of squash or possibly melon I’ve never seen before, an inordinate quantity of broccoli crowns, six pounds of baby carrots, three boxes of Triscuits one of which I apparently opened in the car and two gallons –yes gallons– of plain yogurt, my plans for which I can only imagine since it definitely did not involve consuming the stuff.
Today Miss Plumcake wants to know:
What is the strangest thing you’ve ever bought without recollecting, and what is your favorite late-night grocery story? More importantly, what on EARTH am I going to do with all this yogurt?