I’m tired and I’m working on day three of Satan’s own hangover which has assaulted my person despite the fact my total alcoholic consumption (excluding funerals, which don’t count) in the past week consists of one Black Velvet on Saturday morning and two ciders on Saint Patrick’s Day. The weather is gorgeous and I’m taking the rest of the day off.
I’m going to wax my legs, put on my new Lacroix espadrilles which are so fab it makes me want to DIE, and go out to Pork Chop Friday at Perry’s with some members of my very favorite vicious circle until I get myself into a pork coma.
THEN I’m going to go home, remove my Lacroix espadrilles along with every other stitch of clothing on my fine alabaster frame and –after appropriate sunscreen application (except on my tum, because my doctor said so)– am going to loll naked in the glorious Texas sun, unseen by human eye thanks to the Moroccan-style cabana cum casbah I CONSTRUCTED MYSELF (seriously, I drew the schematics and everything!) and have never gotten to properly enjoy.
Because I am a good blogger and love you all very much I will leave you with a parting gift. There is an enormous sale going on at Lane Bryant today, and if you use the code 000202077 you get 40% off your purchase over $100 and a whopping 50% off orders over $200. Except for Spanx, but that’s okay because Spanx suck, especially on Pork Chop Friday.
I am particularly fond of:
This is what happens. You buy this skirt now, but you think you’ll never wear it. Until you get called for cocktails or a nice reception or have a hot date, and you just grab it and toss on a dead simple ivory cashmere top, or a simple shell and maybe a great colored long cardi and you look fabulous and effortless and you spent about three seconds figuring out to wear. This you will do again and again for the next decade.
This reminds me of the stuff YSL and Prada have been doing the past few summers. There’s been a lot of this dirndl business around lately, and I like it. Granted it’s not the most slimming choice, but it’s not as embiggening as you might think, and besides who cares? If that’s the only thing you worry about then just buy a million black a-line dresses, get them tailored and find another hobby.
I KNOW none of you are going to be on board with this one but I don’t care because I’m going to be so hopped up on porcine goodness that I will suffer the slings and arrows OF YOUR TOTAL WRONGNESS in beatific bliss. If you take a look at the picture of them in olive on the site, you’ll see it’s not really a dropped waist and they have these incredible side pleats on the side for drape without a ton of added fullness. I love them.
I am admittedly a little less sure about these but I’ve seen them deployed really well and I’m just so curious.This whole Left Bank by way of Malaga, Rossy De Palma in the late 80’s vibe feels so fresh to me right now. I want to wear them with a slim cut gauze top and some really slick caramel leather bracelets.
Love. It. LOVE IT. This is a broad-shouldered pear’s dream suit as it balances everything out visually and still is interesting, and, Thanks be to God, doesn’t try to suck you in and up and down and every way to Sunday like so many plus size suits. It’s on my very short list of possible swimtogs for an upcoming girls’ weekend in Las Vegas for poolside lounging.
Me = naked and happy and full of pork chop
These Clothes = fabulous and on epic sale
You = shopping, possibly also naked and happy and full of pork chop, but the point is, I won’t be here to think or hear about it. I’ll catch you on the flipside.