Manolo for the Big Girl Fashion, Lifestyle, and Humor for the Plus Sized Woman.

April 30, 2010

In which Plumcake totally phones it in

Filed under: Uncategorized — Miss Plumcake @ 2:38 pm

So I’m gonna be honest folks, I got nothin.

I don’t have any glamorous weekend plans, I don’t have any exciting stories I can tell other than an ill-fated quasi set-up with a 22 year-old at a benefit on Tuesday, except he was really sweet and reminded me of my little brother so I feel bad making fun of him (of this kid, not of my brother. I love making fun of my brother. I told him God gave him cancer because he hates his stupid goatee) but honestly, if you are a 22 year-old boy (and a very nice one at that) there is just no way you are physically, emotionally, experientially or financially ready this jelly.

This weekend I have purposefully scheduled precisely nothing although I might, if I’m feeling ambitious, exfoliate. Other than that I plan on lounging around topless in the cabana listening to Chet Baker and drinking coconut drinks, because I bought this damn coconut and by GOD I’m going to pour booze in it if it’s the last thing I do.

I’d also kind of like to go to a petting zoo, because I have an overwhelming urge to snuggle some lambkins, but it’s one of those things where you kind of need to go with a kid, because otherwise you’re the grown up macking on the livestock, and despite what you might have heard, that sort of thing is frowned upon in Texas.

In conclusion, WHERE’S BEA?


  1. I’m confused: was this quasi set up a date? What happened to Andre? Have I missed something in the transmission? And if it’s not any of my business (and I’m not really sure if it is, or isn’t, because I’ve read it here on your blog) that’s completely fine and forgive my impertinence.

    Comment by Mrs. Hendricks — April 30, 2010 @ 3:17 pm

  2. @Mrs Hendricks, Andre is still a lamb but it was a location and timing issue. So if things change, we might get back together. But as things stand right now I’m a free agent.

    Comment by Plumcake — April 30, 2010 @ 3:24 pm

  3. Thanks, Plumcake. Hope it works out exactly as you’d like it to.

    Comment by Mrs. Hendricks — April 30, 2010 @ 3:26 pm

  4. I was trying to convince my husband yesterday that we should get a miniature horse rather than another dog (after seeing the video of the tiny colt born this week) but he wasn’t’ buying it.

    Comment by Astra — April 30, 2010 @ 3:34 pm

  5. @Astra. Yeah, the poop is an issue. I love the mini horses, but ye gods, the output.

    Comment by Plumcake — April 30, 2010 @ 3:45 pm

  6. Go coconut with our blessing, Plum. God knows you’ve earned it (just wear sunscreen, we worry!)

    Comment by klee — April 30, 2010 @ 4:00 pm

  7. I’m going to the petting zoo with my children on Sunday. They always want to go but get afraid when the goats and lambs come up to hands. I giggle. The goats are so aggressive in getting treats!

    Comment by BrooklynShoeBabe — April 30, 2010 @ 4:31 pm

  8. That sounds like a lovely weekend! I hope you enjoy it. I got nothing, too. I am going to help my students plant stuff at a neighborhood school and then post my grades, sit back and wait for the tsunami of whining, and go look at real estate.

    Comment by Lisa — April 30, 2010 @ 4:31 pm

  9. Well Plumcake you might want to keep the 22 year old’s number for the future. Younger men can be delightful, when they’re not too young. Or get a second 22 year old and you can triple date?

    Comment by Abby — April 30, 2010 @ 4:41 pm

  10. I went to a petting zoo today at the SF zoo. The whole place was charming and good for a brisk walk. Had to go all the way to the Cliff House (Ocean Beach in SF)for alcohol, though.

    Comment by Debs — April 30, 2010 @ 8:24 pm

  11. You could always volunteer with a school trip or something.

    But miniature horses: no, no no! They haven’t got the brains of a teacup poodle, and they’re about as robust as a teacup. Besides, I’ve always seen you as more the Bringing Up Baby type.

    Comment by raincoaster — April 30, 2010 @ 11:35 pm

  12. Sorry, I saw this linked on the Anna Scholz website and though you may have, too, I couldn’t live with myself if you missed it:


    Comment by Mrs. Hendricks — May 1, 2010 @ 12:49 am

  13. I am currently fostering 4 5-week-old kittens in my bathroom, but that video is the cutest damn thing I’ve seen in awhile.

    Comment by Orora — May 1, 2010 @ 7:35 am

  14. Just yesterday I was shopping in one of my local strange groceries store–the kind of place that imports foods from all over the world, stuff you’d never see here otherwise.
    I encountered a display of little packaged treats from Italy–things I remember seeing displayed at the local coffee bar, as a treat you could have with your espresso. They have little servings of tiramisu, for example; or little variations on the theme of chocolate croissants. Do you know that in Italy “Plumcake” is a sweet, layered, blue plum clafouti-like confection that comes wrapped in single servings?

    Something to think about over that cheery filled coconut.

    Comment by chachaheels — May 1, 2010 @ 9:09 am

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