Manolo for the Big Girl Fashion, Lifestyle, and Humor for the Plus Sized Woman.

June 28, 2010

Lazy Monday Poll: Don’t Talk About The War edition

Filed under: Lazy Poll,Sports — Miss Plumcake @ 11:42 am

Good morning my little vuvuzelas, how’s every little thing?

It was a rough, rough weekend for your pal Plummy. Of course I’m taking about the World Cup. America’s loss to Ghana was sad because you hate the see the home team go down, but I like Ghana and if anyone deserves the psychological victory that comes with bringing home the big W against the U.S., it’s Ghana. BUT.

The England match.

Oh sweet buttered Bolingbroke, the England match.

Let me paint you a little picture: your pal Plummy is not only awake, but fully vested in her England soccer jersey and coordinating Hermès scarf (a girl’s gotta have a little glamor, especially when said girl will be drinking at 8 o’clock on a Sunday morning, because the difference between addict and enthusiast is all in the accessories) and enjoying a full Irish and a velveteen –like a Black and Tan but with cider instead of Bass, also called a snakebite– with my Irish expat friend at the local Irish pub.

The joint is packed with expats and a few wrongthinking people who support Germany –because fanatical Germans waving flags has ended so well for the world, historically–and they play We Will Rock you, which I am ashamed to admit makes me want to kick some ass (see also: the bagpipes. There is something deep in the genetic recesses of my whatever that, upon hearing a live rendition of Scotland the Brave takes me from my normal delightful and mild-mannered self to DOON WI’ TH’ ACCURSED SASSENACH! in about .82 seconds flat. Fun fact, if you watch the very dark  video you can juuuust about see Miss Plumcake in the background here, talking to one of the drummers who was so cute in his kilt I forgot the name of my date, which wouldn’t have been so bad had I not known the aforementioned date for TEN YEARS prior to the incident).

The game started and then…bad things happened.

And the worst part, THE WORST PART, wasn’t that the English were ROBBED of that goal by a stupid bad call –which of course resulted in many enthusiastic chants, the favorite seeming to be “The Referee’s a Wanker” to the tune of “Nanny Nanny Boo Boo”– but the fact that after the game when I went to my ANGLICAN as in ENGLISH church, our opening hymn was “Glorious Things of Thee Are Spoken” set to the tune of Austria by Franz Josef Haydn which is also the tune for…you guessed it: Deutschland, Deutschland Uber Alles, the German National anthem.


ANYHOODLE, what’s been going on with you? Anything grand?  Buy anything sparkly? Get arrested? Meet a new loooovair?  Anything going on in the world of fattery we need to know? Put it in the comments!

46 Comments

  1. The Germans played better and thus have a right to wave their flag. One should not have to be ashamed to be German. You pretty much can’t decide were you are born.

    Comment by Aline — June 28, 2010 @ 12:37 pm

  2. I bought pink pants! They may be fresh and fabulous, they may be tragically M.O.t.B. we shall see. I have some pink sandals, so, dot dot dot. They are these:

    http://www.spiegel.com/shop/product_single.aspx?style_id=36533287

    Hopefully not too Pepto.

    I also bought these (gosh, it has been a little retail-therapy round these parts):

    http://www.6pm.com/lanvin-paris-lv2120-tortoise-crystal

    Something about “archival Lanvin” ringing in my ears? If they work on my melon head it will be my one of my very few Made in France ooh la la items, so here’s hoping. I thought the same glasses in navy quite elegant as well but I do love tortoise.

    Comment by Abby — June 28, 2010 @ 12:47 pm

  3. @Aline: And let us not forget about the rollicking German sense of humor.

    Comment by Plumcake — June 28, 2010 @ 12:49 pm

  4. Oh and I forgot to make US, England and now Mexico Sad Faces. Sad Face!

    Comment by Abby — June 28, 2010 @ 12:52 pm

  5. I bought pink pants! They may be fresh and fabulous, they may be tragically M.O.t.B. we shall see. I have some pink sandals, so, dot dot dot. They are these:

    http://www.spiegel.com/shop/product_single.aspx?style_id=36533287

    Hopefully not too Pepto.

    I also bought these (gosh, it has been a little retail-therapy round these parts):

    http://www.6pm.com/lanvin-paris-lv2120-tortoise-crystal

    Something about “archival Lanvin” ringing in my ears? If they work on my melon head it will be my one of my very few Made in France ooh la la items, so here’s hoping. I thought the same glasses in navy quite elegant as well but I do love tortoise

    Comment by Abby — June 28, 2010 @ 12:54 pm

  6. I did not watch any football this weekend but I _did_ discover a fabulous new restaurant that serves the best Old Fashioned I’ve had in forever. I also hit two farmers’ markets and bought up some scrumptious goodies for dinners this week.

    I did not buy anything sparkly but I did realize that my Aunt’s 80th birthday party is a lovely excuse for buying new shoes! There is shopping in my future!

    Comment by Miss B — June 28, 2010 @ 12:57 pm

  7. I just really, really wanted you all to know I bought pink pants. Cringe.

    Comment by Abby — June 28, 2010 @ 1:06 pm

  8. The English match was sad, the Mexico match was even sadder.

    We need to discuss how beautiful those Ghanian players are. First, the goals were absolutely incredible, but those players…the bone structure, their skin. They are like sculptures in flawless perfection.

    I’m jetlagged. I have a new swimsuit. And I still haven’t turned in my manuscript, the one that was due two lazy Monday polls ago because I am a terrible, irresponsible bad person and a perfectionist and the worst role model for writing and researching ever in the history of the world. Maybe I’ll go shop for shoes and eat something fried.

    Comment by Lisa — June 28, 2010 @ 1:15 pm

  9. @Lisa, but you have tenure, so who cares?! And YES about the Ghanians. My dear friend in college was a no-foolin’ princess from Ghana and she might be the most gorgeous regal creature I’ve ever seen. I’m officially backing the Ghana team now. I was rooting for Argentina anyway, but it was cold comfort after the England match.

    @Abby: Pink pants! Lanvin! What’s not to love? I’m a little concerned about pink on pink because unless the pinks match exactly it’ll end badly and if they do match perfectly you’ve still got a chance of Cosmetics Saleslady. But I applaud your eschewing of black shoes with everything, so hurrah!

    @Miss B: I had an Old Fashioned last night too, by my beloved Irish bartender Sean at the Driskill Hotel. Ain’t nothing wrong with that. Where’s your place?

    Comment by Plumcake — June 28, 2010 @ 1:21 pm

  10. Snakebite for breakfast? Respect! Those things aren’t for the weak.

    Comment by Madame Suggia — June 28, 2010 @ 1:23 pm

  11. I thought the game was fab but then again I’m rooting for Germany….I know, I know I’m sorry! I blame it on living as an Au Pair there (which is how I came to love the game).

    Bagpipes have the exact same effect on me. I always wanted a nice man in a kilt who could play the pipes…

    Comment by Jeni — June 28, 2010 @ 1:35 pm

  12. There’s something about bagpipes that definitely stirs the soul, for good or for ill. For me, it’s the former, even though I have not one spot of Scots blood in me.

    I haven’t bought anything shiny, sadly, but I did get a couple of very flattering and comfy knee-length skirts in t-shirt fabric. Perfect for summer, as I am NOT a shorts person.

    As well, we took the wee one out for ice cream for the first time yesterday. He enjoyed it immensely, if the look of bliss on his face was any indication.

    Comment by La Petite Acadienne — June 28, 2010 @ 1:47 pm

  13. and in fat related news….I’m feeling unflatteringly pleased at reading that Gwyneth Paltrow has early onset Osteoporosis from years of moronic diets. I’m fairly sure this is Karma come knocking for Shallow Hal. I didn’t say it was an attractive feeling, but I’m owning it.

    Comment by Thea — June 28, 2010 @ 1:50 pm

  14. Let’s see now:
    No snakebites, but the DH brought home a six pack of Magners Cider, which I have been religiously drinking one a night since. We were introduced to cider the last time we were in the UK – I”m not sure I’m ready for snakebites in the morning (that sounds like the title to an Irish fiddle tune, actually), but I’m willing to try.
    Well, my retail therapy consists of sewing and I made myself a kimono sleeved blouse from a 1957 pattern that actually fits and doesn’t look too Lucy Arnaz. Good enough, actually to make again, which I’m gonna.
    And I took pity on four very sad bananas and turned them into a cake with cream cheese frosting and chopped walnuts. And my son ate some and not only did not complain (he is a ‘I refuse to eat nuts’ person), he asked for seconds. I expect to come home today and find he’s left me a piece on a plate in the fridge.

    Comment by Toby Wollin — June 28, 2010 @ 2:02 pm

  15. The only snakebite in my world is an amazing sax player. He was in Mr. Twistie’s studio a few weeks ago and I want him here almost every day. He’s that good and that nice.

    The only shopping I’ve done in the past week was for good, solid athletic socks so that I wouldn’t develop Blisters of Doooooom while walking in the Relay for life. Oh, and ingredients for the yummy cookies I baked for the event. I never want to see another oatmeal cookie with dried fruit again. They were really great, but I baked too many to even think about.

    What’s new in my life is the collection of sore muscles and the desperately fuzzy head after a 24-hour event in a Good Cause and a dead TV, which we hope to replace tonight when Mr. Twistie gets home from his day gig.

    In the meantime, I forsee a nap in my future, possibly followed by a long soak with epsom salts.

    Comment by Twistie — June 28, 2010 @ 2:23 pm

  16. Oh, and you can tell I’m out of it when I fail to comment on the delights of bagpipes and kilts. Consider both admired greatly, would you dearie?

    Comment by Twistie — June 28, 2010 @ 2:24 pm

  17. I bought something sparkly! It’s a big glass bowl for the dining room table & its diameter is the same size as the hatch back space of a Volkswagen GTI (so we could get it home). Also, (simpering) I went to the new SF MOMA exhibit of the art work from the Fisher collection (fabulous). So, I bought a museum memership too.

    And caramel swirl ice cream from a great place in Oakland. And a Pisco sour in Berkeley.

    Thea, I too, don’t like Gwynnie. It’s the whole “lifestyle guru” trip from an uber-rich, apparently emaciated WASP who proudly and publicly follows stringent “cleansing” diets.

    Comment by Debs — June 28, 2010 @ 2:38 pm

  18. Dying a little inside after watching my beloved Dodgers drop two out of three to the Yankees over the weekend. I hate interleague play.

    And Joe Torre, usually a fine manager, apparently figures that it is not really possible to overwork a 26-year-old, 300-pound closing pitcher. This is not the case, as became clear last night.

    But anyway, go, Ghana!

    Comment by Mifty — June 28, 2010 @ 2:38 pm

  19. @LPA Awww…

    @Thea I’m totally down for schadenfreuding the Goopster but I too have a Vit. D deficiency and I’m a fatty Mc. Fatterson. Mine from being a vegetarian and living in Pacific NW. Luckily though we F. Mc Fats don’t tend towards bone loss, but other nasty things, so I’m on a tedious vitamin regimen.

    The pink pants arrived (waves at cute Samoan UPS man) and sadly, no. Pepto colored with unflattering pleats and too big. But really long, and truly wide leg, for the long-legged person out there who could pull them off. They do come in other colors.

    They arrived with some black linen gauchos which now aren’t on the website anymore, which aren’t very exciting but will be quite useful for hot weather. If Seattle “summer” ever arrives.

    Comment by Abby — June 28, 2010 @ 2:46 pm

  20. I WANT the green sparklers but dont wear anything above a kitten heel. I did buy a rug that makes my heart go pitter pat and cost a couple years of the shoe budget. But its fantastic!

    Comment by Peaches — June 28, 2010 @ 2:59 pm

  21. @Peaches: I’m a sucker for a good rug. if I could have wall to wall Oriental carpets layered everywhere, I would. I love that look. Pictures?

    @Abby/Thea: I have no love for GP, but I’ve got incredibly low vitamin D too, and will actually have to have a biopsy later this month about it to make sure I don’t have Celiac (dude, how much would THAT suck?). I eat red meat and dairy, spend an hour a day naked in the Texas sun (behind the curtains of my cabana, of course) and STILL have to take RX-strength vitamin D.

    @Debs: I’m pretty sure I’m going to need to see that bowl.

    Comment by Plumcake — June 28, 2010 @ 3:10 pm

  22. @Twistie, congratulations on a well-walked race!

    @Toby: Did you ever have scrumpy? It’s farmhouse cider. It’s the sort of thing you have to ask the publican for, and then maybe he’ll go back into the back room and come out with an unlabeled jug. I had a quarter pint when I first arrived in Canterbury after traveling for 24 hours and was knee-wobbling drunk. A very nice homeless Welshman named Tom walked me to the abbey where I was staying and I faceplanted for 24 hours.

    @Acadienne: That is some A+ baby ice cream deliciousness.

    Comment by Plumcake — June 28, 2010 @ 3:14 pm

  23. @ Mifty You are not alone. My poor dear husband was in a ghastly mood after the Dodgers’ last with the Yankees. I nearly made him shut off the computer streaming because he was getting so annoyed and our wispy internet here won’t support his computer and mine anyway (the Portuguese seem to be oddly indifferent to the Dodgers. A blemish on an otherwise fine country and people; they make up for with quality of booze, so computer streaming is the only way he can hear Vin Scully during this part of the summer.

    Caramel ice creaaaaam.

    Comment by Lisa — June 28, 2010 @ 3:31 pm

  24. Because I’m tired of dreary people with distressing politics adopting as their name one of life’s lovelier social occasions, I’ve decided to take it back, and so threw a formal tea party. I made petit fours and decorated them with handmade fondant flowers. We had cookies and cucumber sandwiches, served on my grandmother’s china, the luncheon plates to which hadn’t been put to proper use in 50 years. Then eight women from ages 20 to 77 talked fashion, family, jewelry, local history, and gardening. We had a fabulous time, and have agreed to keep doing it on a monthly basis, albeit a bit less elaborately.

    Comment by Margo A — June 28, 2010 @ 3:38 pm

  25. I’m in the South. It is unseasonably hot (even for the south). My air conditioning is now leaking freon (which I’ve been told is a very. bad. thing.)

    So my sparkly new purchase is a new Air Conditioning unit to be installed tomorrow. At least considering the cost it darn well better sparkle. For the price I could have bought a Honda with air conditioning included.

    Comment by Katie — June 28, 2010 @ 3:50 pm

  26. The English deserved to lose, even with the disallowed goal. (Yeah, I was supporting Germany, but I’m Irish so that’s allowed.) The Germans were brilliant, and the English were – well, exactly as they always are.

    Comment by Liz — June 28, 2010 @ 3:57 pm

  27. @Margo lovely!

    @Plumcake celiac would indeed suuuuuuck. I shall hold good thoughts. At least shoes and hard liquor don’t contain gluten right? (Pretty sure about the liquor…)

    Comment by Abby — June 28, 2010 @ 4:03 pm

  28. I bought a skirt on Friday. I wore the skirt on Sunday. I don’t wear skirts. This is probably why all those lovely teams lost.

    But when the skirt fits in the waist AND the hips AND is the perfect length (at the knee for me: longer is very dowdy and we don’t talk about shorter) all at the same time, you know the heavens have opened and sent a message specifically for you and you just have to run with it.

    Comment by TropicalChrome — June 28, 2010 @ 4:14 pm

  29. Plummie, here is my new rug. http://www.restorationhardware.com/rh/catalog/product/product.jsp?productId=prod1650059&navCount=4

    Katie–Im with ya sista! In Charleston Im melting!

    Comment by Peaches — June 28, 2010 @ 4:22 pm

  30. Directly inspired by this blog, I sprang for a pair of so-cute nude pumps by a brand that I like, which I found at 50% off, plus Internet coupon to negate the shipping! I am rather pleased.

    I wonder if I might ask the advice of the experienced readers and writers of this blog, because I just cannot seem to decide whether it’s worth the risk:

    If my hip measurement is 1″–1″!–larger than the largest size given for a pair of pants, do you think they might actually still maybe fit without looking godawful?

    (Said pants are a wide-legged gaucho style in a stretchy fabric, in black. And it may be worth noting that I generally wear shirts that cover my hips.)

    I do dearly wish that I could find promising gauchos In A Store Near Me, so that I could try them on in person first, but believe me, I have looked everywhere without success.

    Thanks for any advice you all might be willing to share! And thank you, Ms. Plumcake, for writing–and for providing bagpipes; they stir my Irish-American soul!

    Comment by The Accidental Tangoiste — June 28, 2010 @ 4:25 pm

  31. Margo…you are the essence of fabulous!!! As I rant about politics you gave it a nice twist. Brilliant!

    Comment by Peaches — June 28, 2010 @ 4:25 pm

  32. Has anyone else had comments disappear? It’s happened a couple of times to me now and I’m curious if it’s my internet or the site. It’s too bad, too. They were witty comments. Extremely witty. But spontaneous and non-reproducible. Tragic really.

    Comment by Eilish — June 28, 2010 @ 7:58 pm

  33. @Lisa — even as badly as the Boys in Blue have been playing lately, Vin makes it all worthwhile, doesn’t he?

    Comment by Mifty — June 28, 2010 @ 8:47 pm

  34. Back in Connecticut after a fantastic trip back home to Houston. It was HOT y’all! I finally thawed from this New England winter. I’ve been hitting the beach a lot lately and I’m fast on the way being coconutty! I’m thinking of taking a gig with another company and moving points south but I am undecided and the mental drama is giving me a case of agida.

    I haven’t really been watching the World Cup, so huzzah and boo hiss to whichever teams y’all please.

    Abby, the cut on those pink pants is so Kate Hepburn! And good for you to step waayyy outside the box on that color. So bold!

    Lisa, where did you find your swim suit and what color did you get?

    Plummy, I should have hot footed it to Austin and had drinks at the Driskill. It’s been at least five years since my last visit.

    Thea, what gives me a spark of glee about that story is that she was so selfrighteous in her condescension of the poor-fat-people who can’t live her fabulous life. Buck up, Gwennie, you’ll be the thinnest quasimodo at Shady Pines.

    Toby, I’ll give you a nickle if you let me lick the cake plate.

    Tropic, don’t you love it when something actually works? Where did you find the skirt? What color is it?

    Peaches, that rug is so lovely. Does it feel like the plushest thing ever?

    Tango, get those pants! If they don’t fit just send them right back. No harm, no foul.

    Comment by Melissa — June 28, 2010 @ 9:53 pm

  35. Margo you inspired me! I’m going to haul out my antique bone china tea cups and help bring back tea party to it’s rightful place of grace and civility!

    I’m in Texas and it’s HOT. Was in Minnesota over the weekend and people were complaining about the beastly 80 degree heat wave. It was to weep. We’ll be lucky if we get down to 80 overnight here.

    Comment by Thea — June 28, 2010 @ 10:03 pm

  36. I had an amazing first date with a tall, dark, and handsome man with a degree and a long term job who thinks I am beautiful at size 24. He’s got a sexy Boston accent, amazing brown eyes with looooong dark eyelashes, works out 5/7 days a week, and says he is “ready to think about a commitment.” Ladies….this one’s off the market. *wink, wink* I think my strategy of not settling actually paid off. God willing, I think this Might Be The One!

    Comment by Annie — June 28, 2010 @ 10:54 pm

  37. Oh, good point, Melissa–can’t believe that hadn’t occurred to me! Thank you for the advice!

    Annie, best luck to you; he sounds dee-licious all around!

    Enjoy your tea parties, ladies! An excellent idea, Margo.

    Comment by The Accidental Tangoiste — June 28, 2010 @ 11:45 pm

  38. I’m totally with ya on the bagpipes, Plumcake. There’s something about the sound of them that stirs what Scots blood I do have.

    I don’t care if my brother insists they sound like cats mating. Philistine.

    I’ve been a cider aficionado for years. I’ll have to try a Snakebite. Sounds good.

    I am currently recovering from having weeded the patio and walkway. Hoping to get to sewing at least a few of the vintage patterns I’ve been collecting. I wish redrafting/resizing didn’t take so long.

    Comment by Geogrrl — June 29, 2010 @ 12:36 am

  39. I’m totally in empathy with all of you in the South. June in Philadelphia has been evil, 90+ degrees and dewpoints in the 70s. How on earth do you manage to look bandbox fresh in the dregs of heat and humidity?

    Comment by Constance — June 29, 2010 @ 8:44 am

  40. Constance–I feel ya!! The rain last night in Philly cooled us down for a little bit, but this morning, BAM, back in the 90s.

    Plus, it’s Philly. Center City smells awful. Am I right? You know I’m right. :) (Nice to see someone else in Philly commenting!)

    Comment by Genevieve — June 29, 2010 @ 4:55 pm

  41. @ Melissa–I got my new swimsuit from woman within… It is the o-print one. I got it in green and black.

    @ mifty tonight (morning for us) vin made an obscure butter-and-egg man reference. Could he be more awesome? No.

    Comment by Lisa — June 30, 2010 @ 3:00 am

  42. We went back to the antique store where I got the Art Nouveau brooch and scored a pair of gorgeous costume rings; the lady remembered us and wanted to make sure hubby got his lasagne!

    Spent this entire weekend working a lovely pitcher of mai tais and inhaling the latest book by one of my all-time favorite writers. He only publishes about every four years and the new one was released in May; I have a looooooong wait, don’t I?

    Speaking of lasagne, I did come up for air Sunday long enough to make this amazing spinach and Fontina lasagne I found on Epicurious.com. Find it, try it, gorge.

    Comment by Whitney — June 30, 2010 @ 4:18 am

  43. The husband and I were both laid up for days with severe stomach flu. And then our 6-year-old cat died from an overdose of anaesthesia during a routine dental cleaning. It has been a bad, bad week in the Big Scary household.

    On the upside I’ve been getting lots of compliments on some reversible dresses I designed and made for myself. I guess I’m going to have to learn to make them in other sizes if people want to give me money for them.

    Comment by BSAG — July 1, 2010 @ 4:07 pm

  44. @BSAG, oh lamb, I’m sorry. Six years old is way too young. I want to see your dresses and, if you’d like to make them for our big girl audience, I’d be glad to do a feature on them for you!

    Comment by Plumcake — July 1, 2010 @ 4:09 pm

  45. @ Genevieve. Howdy to another Philadelphian. Eh, I remember the stench of Center City in the summer especially on trash day. But South Phila doesn’t really smell that much better. And after these last glorious four days we’re in for another stinking heat wave.

    But at Chez Constance there is a heavenly aroma as my oriental lillies are in bloom.

    Comment by Constance — July 2, 2010 @ 7:46 pm

  46. @Plumcake – don’t worry, if you are diagnosed with celiac disease, it’s not that bad. I was diagnosed 2 years ago, and thought it would be horrible, but there are a lot of good gluten-free options and more good GF options have been coming out.

    And hard liquor is totally okay, which was a giant relief to me.

    Comment by Abbey — July 5, 2010 @ 11:39 pm

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