Manolo for the Big Girl Fashion, Lifestyle, and Humor for the Plus Sized Woman.

July 24, 2010

Morning Has Broken

Filed under: Lazy Poll — Twistie @ 12:20 pm

As I stumbled down the stairs this am in my usual desperate search for caffeine… well, there really wasn’t much else on my – for lack of a better term at that point – mind. My one thought was “COFFEE!!! COFFEE!!!” and I’m not ashamed to admit that. Once I got the coffee, my one thought was a familiar one that I have most mornings these days: “I really have turned into my Aunt Louise.”

No, really, the very first time my brothers and I saw a rockhopper penguin,

we all immediately agreed that it resembled nothing so much as Aunt Louise before her first cup of coffee in the morning.

Yeah. That’s now me in the morning. I get up, look scary – yet oddly adorable – make coffee, grab a nosh after the coffee (darlings, if I attempt to cook before caffeinating myself, I would probably set the entire house ablaze and be entirely too dazed to save myself), and sit down to check my email. After that I can slowly ease myself into life

This morning, however, I had a third thought, which is pushing it for me before I’m properly caffeinated. I wondered how my fellow Big Girls wake up in the morning. Do you have a ritual? Something you need to do before you face the world? Is your morning face less terrifying than mine?


  1. I totally know what you mean! Though I’m not a coffee drinker (not from self righteousness… I drink soda instead), I definitely have the bleary-eyed, hair-sticking-in-all-directions look about me. But the first thing I always have to do (other than putting on pants of course) is take out my adorable dog Waffles. Then I can attend to my needs, which usually involve whatever beverage we have in the house and ‘nilla wafers.

    Comment by Rebecca — July 24, 2010 @ 1:04 pm

  2. For me it’s tea. Very strong black tea (Assam by preference) with lots of milk and no sugar. Now that my hair is very short there’s only so tousled I can look, so not the full penguin, but I’m not really at my best. Also, unless the night before featured a stunning amount of either food or alcohol, I demand food right away as well. I’m going on vacation with friends this week, and I’m making certain we stock breakfast foods. The first time I traveled with this crowd I only survived the first morning because I found an emergency tea bag in my luggage and ate leftover potato chips with it. It was NOT pretty.

    Comment by cedar — July 24, 2010 @ 2:18 pm

  3. My mornings are always the same: scoop litter box, sweep floor, feed pets, drink coffee, walk dog, ride stationary bike, shower, get ready for work/errands/whatever I’m doing that day. This means I must always get up three and a half hours before I have to be somewhere: one hour for pet care (including dog walking), half an hour for bike ride, one hour to shower and get ready, and I always allow an hour for driving time just in case traffic is bad. Which is why I never schedule anything before 10 a.m. if I can help it.

    Comment by Cat — July 24, 2010 @ 2:54 pm

  4. I can function before being caffeinated (with an 11-month old, there’s not much choice). But I do definitely need the coffee and shower before actually feeling like a human being.

    And my morning face is terrifying. I have a bad habit of sleeping with my contacts in, and so in the morning, one eye is usually desert-dry, rendering it unable to fully open. So I’m walking around all pasty-mouthed, frizzy haired, and resembling nothing so much as Popeye around the eye area.

    Comment by La Petite Acadienne — July 24, 2010 @ 3:49 pm

  5. Some time in my mid-thirties (I’m 51 now), I turned into a revoltingly cheerful morning person. Possibly the constant hangovers had kept it at bay before then. Nowadays, I spring out of bed between 5 and 6, feed the cats, make coffee and breakfast for me, write a couple of pages in my journal, wake and feed the fam and then I’m ready for anything.

    Comment by Deb — July 24, 2010 @ 3:55 pm

  6. I roll out of bed, put on some less than flattering outfit, and stumble to the gym. Not out of any moral superiority, but if I don’t, my chronic pain ruins my day. If I work out, my body will actually function during the day!

    Comment by smili — July 24, 2010 @ 4:55 pm

  7. I am horrified at how I look when I get out of bed. I have short hair and it STILL manages to stick out in every direction, looking like I had a fight with pillows and lost….badly. Plus my eyes run so I often have crusty stuff in the corner of my eyes…very attractive somewhere on this planet I am sure, but not in my world. My morning routine during workdays is get out of bed, have shower, put on my face, get dressed and then check my e-mails, feeds and play on FB for a little bit. The weekend is not much different, except add brewing a pot of coffee or tea right after my shower. I am able to function without caffeine first thing in the a.m. but if I don’t have a cup by 9:30 a.m. I am searching it out like a cadaver hound.

    Comment by DebDarling — July 24, 2010 @ 6:08 pm

  8. During the school year I have to get up at 5 a.m. I hate mornings and for the first 45 minutes I don’t talk to anybody. It’s meds, diet soda, toothpaste, hair gel, and minimual make-up, plus comfy clothes and shoes. By the time I’m ready to hit the car for the drive to work, I might be able to grunt. Summer, however, is vastly different. I don’t go to bed until 3 or 4 a.m. — and get up at 10, both verbal and happy. It’s still meds and diet soda, but I can shuffle around in muumuus and sandals, with hair and teeth unbrushed. Lovely time is summer.

    Comment by Melissa — July 24, 2010 @ 6:30 pm

  9. I have two daughters, 3 and 5 years old. The first thing I have to do in the morning when I wake up is shove them off of me without waking them up. Dangit if I know how they keep getting into my bedroom or why they find me so comfy. I’m kinda lumpy compared to their mattress. lol. I’m fully functioning after I have my 1st Diet coke but that usually doesn’t happen until an hour later and I’m on the bus to work.

    Comment by BrooklynShoeBabe — July 24, 2010 @ 8:45 pm

  10. My fabulous Aunt Martha (whom I have become – thank god!) is famous for her “black juice” in the morning — Coke instead of oj. I am so coffee-dependent I can’t even talk to the cats before my first cuppa. I love the auto-brew function. A second or two before or after the radio begins to play I hear the coffee pot beep and I thank myself for setting it up the night before. A pot of coffee made *before* consuming coffee is a dicey proposition! Hubby & I listen to The World Cafe with David Dye and talk until the kids come climb on us (kids must like lumpy). It’s pretty cool. Between our coffee talks in bed and walking together several mornings a week, we have a lovely, strong relationship after nearly 14 years together. Which is a good thing, because it’s usually my second cup before I even think of what I might look like. Ahem …

    Comment by pamici — July 24, 2010 @ 9:40 pm

  11. First I hit the snooze about five times. Once awake, I take my anti-heartburn med, then go find the coffee. I find the anti-heartburn med works better if it has a head start. I’ve already cut out mint from my diet and don’t eat much chocolate. Hell if I’m not having coffee.

    Comment by g-lo — July 25, 2010 @ 12:39 pm

  12. After taking care of the unmentionable necessities, I do twenty minutes of yoga, shower, and dress. 2.6 mile walk to work where I reward myself with the coffee of the gods — the Ethiopian coffee shop down the street from my office roasts its own on premises. I order a triple espresso and a teacake which I take to work with me and eat as I try not to scream at my email. *G*

    Comment by Fabrisse — July 25, 2010 @ 1:35 pm

  13. To grab a phrase from a button: Not A Morning Person Doesn’t Even Begin To Cover It.

    I have a ritual in the morning because doing actions by rote is about the only way I can get myself jumpstarted. I get up, shower, fix hair/face to appropriate level for the day’s activities, feed the cats, bring in the paper, make coffee, eat pretty much the same breakfast I eat every day. Those who know and love me know not to try to engage me in superfluous conversation (anything less important than “the house is on fire”) before the first half cup of coffee.

    Yes, of course I exaggerate – when I have to make an 8am flight (which is a patently ridiculous hour to be traveling) I’m up, awake, alert, and actually relatively pleasant to be around. But this happens only with some effort and I’m nowhere near my peak intellectually.

    Comment by TropicalChrome — July 25, 2010 @ 4:16 pm

  14. I like to get up when everyone else in the house is still asleep. It’s so lovely and quiet! I make myself a cappuccino, feed the cat, and read for about an hour. Heaven. When my husband gets up, I make *him* some cappucino. Shortly thereafter, the girls (ages 9 and 23) get up, and the chaos begins! :)

    Comment by theDiva — July 25, 2010 @ 7:52 pm

  15. Some of you people are sickos! Firstly, you cheery, exercising people that actually think 6:00 is a morning hour (It’s an hour after happy hour people! and 5 AM is a myth) are twisted. Secondly, morning is the awful time when you have to wake up and try to remember if you REALLY wrote that on Facebook and did you seriously email that loser you use to date. A few shots of extra stong joe or hair of the dog and I can start repairing my insanity of the night before.

    Comment by Jennie — July 25, 2010 @ 10:51 pm

  16. I try to have everything done the night before- coffeepot set, clothes laid out, lunch made, bag packed. If I don’t there is little to no guarantee I’ll even remember to put shoes on. I also shower at night, my hair takes way too long to dry and at this point it’s become part of my “relax for bed” routine, so showers make me sleepy, not awake. So, when I wake up all I have to do is fall out of bed, into my clothes, contacts if I remember, grab lunch and coffee then out the door to the bus stop. I can do it in under 15 minutes of I need to.

    Comment by Beth C. — July 25, 2010 @ 11:17 pm

  17. I snooze my husband 2-5 times (yep he is my alarm clock and he is so sweet about it), then stumble into the kitchen and grab my coffee. In the summer I keep a pitcher of it cold in the fridge and in the winter my sweet wonderful husband makes if for me. I am not entirely sure what I look like, but on occasion my husband has wanted to take pictures of my hair…Which will never, ever happen! After coffee then comes showering and getting ready, possibly eating breakfast if I remember.

    Comment by Jess — July 25, 2010 @ 11:31 pm

  18. Vitamins. Powerade. Then we can at least walk.

    To grab a phrase from a button: Not A Morning Person Doesn’t Even Begin To Cover It.

    Must have this.

    Comment by littlem — July 25, 2010 @ 11:52 pm

  19. Alarm goes off at 0515. Teeth brushed, face washed (the Aveeno pads Plumcake recommended!), dressed. Kiss sleeping husband, say goodbye. Downstairs, hit ‘go’ button on coffee machine, pack lunch, put coffee into thermos mug, out the door and hoping to miss most of DC traffic. I eat breakfast once I’m at work (which is by 0630 if I haven’t hit the snooze button too many times).

    Comment by TeleriB — July 26, 2010 @ 8:42 am

  20. let’s put it this way. My kitchen is on the first floor, my coffee maker is in my bathroom on the 2nd floor because going down the stairs is too dangerous without my first cup of coffee.

    Comment by Thea — July 26, 2010 @ 11:30 am

  21. I wake up, stretch, stretch some more, debate getting up, then get slink out of bed wrapped in a sheet or robe. Shuffle to the kitchen to start making tea. Go to bathroom to brush teeth and remove dragon breath. Brush hair to look less wanton. Take shower. Go back to kitchen for tea. Get dressed. Go back to bathroom to put on makeup. Find appropriate heels and jewelry where ever they are located in the house. Debate breakfast unless my sweetheart is there making it for me. Walk out the door.
    Total time: 30 – 45 mins because I hate to rush in the morning

    This changes drastically if a dog is in residence – for the better as far as I’m concerned.

    I’m definitely not a morning person but I do fake civility fairly well.

    Comment by Bunny — July 26, 2010 @ 3:25 pm

  22. I don’t suppose you’d buy that I wake up next to Viggo Mortensen, would you?

    Comment by raincoaster — July 27, 2010 @ 1:37 am

  23. Ok am I the only one who, after hitting snooze 3-5 times, drags immediately to the bathroom to PEE??!??! Or is no one saying it because they assume that is really the first thing we all do?? Anyways, work mornings for me are very routine. After the snooze and pee-time I get in the shower, call in the hubby, dress, head downstairs to fix breakfast for the drive to work for both of us, pack lunches, make tea for Adam D, write a note on the mini-whiteboard for Adam D. Then we both read our notes, scurry to the cars and head to work.

    When I used to have to get up at 4 am to get to work for 5am I would literally roll out of bed, brush my hair and put on clothing and then drive to work! I figured if people couldn’t handle a rumpled April D serving them coffee at the un-godly hour of 5 am then they didn’t DESERVE their caffeine fix ;) Luckily (for them!) no one ever complained…likely because no one seeking coffee that early was able to function enough to SEE before said coffee!

    I’ve never been a coffee drinker but mostly because it wreaks havoc on my digestion. Love the smell though and, if I know I’ll be within range of a bathroom 20 minutes later, occasionally I will drink a tasty cup of French Vanilla or Breakfast Blend…usually though at work I sip a delicious cup of green tea with jasmine!

    Comment by April D — July 27, 2010 @ 12:23 pm

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