Manolo for the Big Girl Fashion, Lifestyle, and Humor for the Plus Sized Woman.

September 20, 2010

Mothers, Daughters & Diets

Filed under: Uncategorized — Miss Plumcake @ 2:02 pm

I try –admittedly not hard, but I do try– not to go around mother-bashing. First of all, the county sheriff took away my baseball bat after an ugly incident involving varying opinions on sequins for day (IT’S STILL NOT OKAY, HOW DO PEOPLE NOT SEE THAT???) and secondly my own mother is going to make me a very wealthy woman when the tell-all is through and I don’t want to give away any spoilers.

BUT one of the things I’ve noticed, particularly after last week’s fad dieting question is the cycle of either an overweight or an overly weight-conscious mother putting her own daughter (who may or may not be overweight herself) on diets.


Someone please tell me that’s not happening anymore. That our mothers were just uninformed products of their ages. Right?

It’s something I wrestle with regularly. Almost every Especially Fat girl I know has food/body/diet issues that were actively passed down from their female relatives, usually mother. Sometimes grandmother. I got a triple punch of mother, grandmother AND great grandmother –whose last words to me on this earth were “Have you always been so fat?”– and although I’m clearly pretty okay re: food issues and whatnot, I don’t pretend it didn’t affect me and sometimes I get bitter.

But does it do any good?

I don’t think so. I mean sure it lets me work up a righteous huff and Lord knows there are few things in the world I love than a good righteous huff (Hermès is one, that thing with my ankles is another) but since I’m not having any kids of my own I don’t have to worry about inadvertently passing on body image woes.

I’d be interested in hearing from mothers of daughters who are overweight, or who might someday become big girls, on your successes and pitfalls negotiating a way to healthy body image. If you’re unhappy about your weight do you take it out on your daughter? Is your daughter overweight and you want to encourage her to drop some pounds for whatever reasons? I can see the temptation of wanting a girl to have the social advantage of thinness, but does it really work to try to enforce it?

September 19, 2010

The More Things Change, the More They Stay Panicky About Weight

Filed under: Media,Random Annoyances — Twistie @ 8:30 am

As I’ve mentioned before, Mr. Twistie always finds interesting things at flea markets. A couple weeks ago, he found an issue of the Ladies’ Home Journal from 1961. There were several articles in it he wanted to take a look at, but as soon as he got it home he handed it off to me so that I could take a look at the article about how three Hollywood stars – Janet Leigh, Jack Lemmon, and Natalie Wood – manage to stay so slim.

I thought in light of Plummy’s recent call for your stories of fad dieting, some of you might be interested in a couple quotes. For those of you who may have been dealing with an ED, be aware that some quotes may well be triggering and proceed with caution, if at all.

September 18, 2010

Twistie’s Sunday Caption Madness: The Tokyo Screams Edition: The Result

Filed under: Twistie's Sunday Caption Madness — Twistie @ 10:54 am

Oh. My. Dears.

Last week I insulted your visual centers with this disturbing image:
and you came back swinging with fifteen fabulous responses.

You referenced everything from Spongebob to the BP oil spill, from huge restaurant portions to insane fad diets. You made me laugh right out loud.

In the end, though, there can be but one winner. This week it’s the luscious LL for this ode to Bad Party Ideas:

That weekend, Boudreau learned an important lesson about mixing raves and crawfish boils. Never again.

Congratulations, LL! And thanks to everyone who played.

September 17, 2010

Elle throws us a bone, with meat on it (see what I did there?)

Filed under: Fashion,Makeup,Media,Models,Movies — Miss Plumcake @ 9:08 am

So everyone else has written about it but I guess I’ve got to toss my lovely Peter Bettley chapeau in.

Fat Girl of the Moment, Gabourey Sidibe — plus-size star of Precious, in case you just got off the boat from Mars– graces one of four covers of Elle this month and people are getting their collective knickers in a twist, and for once it’s not that a fat person is on a magazine.

Nope, it’s skin lightening. Apparently Ms Sidibe’s cover shows her skin several shades lighter than how she photographs in natural and/or red carpet lighting.

Is it whitewashing?

Eeesh, I don’t know. Frankly I wouldn’t put it past Elle, but on the other hand, I really do think it’s the lighting this time. It looks like the lighting rig for that cover was pretty simple and I know from my experience my own skin shoots way way lighter (inasmuch as it’s possible for a girl who has been known to MAC face & body in WHITE as foundation to shoot lighter) in a rig like that than I do in natural light.

But I gotta say, I don’t just love Gabby on the cover of Elle. It’s a gimmick. It’s a bone to the people who complain Elle and its ilk only put thin, pretty, white women on the covers of their magazines (possibly because Elle and its ilk only put thin, pretty, white women on the covers of their magazines). It’s Beth Ditto 2.0 but even less plausible because Beth Ditto truly is interested and interesting when it comes to fashion.

Gabby, talent though she might have, is just the token fat girl 2010.

I’m fat, not stupid. I’m not getting excited over this (and yeah, don’t think we didn’t notice all the other covers are mostly body shots while Gabby’s body is mostly obscured)

Do you know what gets me excited?

When there are all manner of body shapes represented and it’s Not A Big Deal. It’s not part of a Size Issue or some nonsense about Celebrating Your Curves or Realness or (gag) Goddess blahdeblah.

For example:

Here in The Killers video Mr Brightside –which for my money ranks up there in the echelon with Express Yourself, Vogue, and Freedom 90 for Most Important Fashion Videos of All Time— you have a perfectly gorgeous luscious plus-sized woman being treated just like all the other ahem, courtesans.

Super sexy outfit, clearly comfortable with her over-the-top sexuality, she’s a featured dancer with plenty of screen time, and somehow it’s Not A Big Deal. She’s not hidden or dropped in there as a token and her skin almost certainly wasn’t lightened (the heroine’s was, although obviously that was for effect. I’ll also bet you a million imaginary dollars the makeup artist used Mac face and body in White on her, too, albeit in a heavier application than I use). THIS is progress.

And do we have to talk about how cute Brandon Flowers is in his sharp jacket (that, btw, is how a dinner jacket is supposed to fit, slim through the shoulders and arms) or how when Eric Roberts became so filthy hot? Because I am currently associated with the hottest man on the planet (seriously, you would die) and Mister R and his smoking jacket STILL make me need to take a lie down.

September 16, 2010

Little Rant/ Big Question

Filed under: Food,The Big Question — Miss Plumcake @ 2:28 pm

Do you know what I love about this blog?

I mean other than the money and free stuff and all you crazy wonderful dames? I love that this is a space where you don’t have to hate yourself.

Because you know what? I am thirty-one damn years old and Mama is TIRED of being told I’m supposed to hate myself because I’m too something and not something else enough. I don’t, okay? Never did. Sorry! And you probably don’t either and even if you DID feel that way I am here to tell you right here, right now, in front of God, Gaultier and everybody else, that you officially can stop feeling bad about the way you look because I like you just fine the way you are and I am pretty much always right when it comes to people I’m not going to sleep with and although I love you, I don’t, you know, love you.

It might sound strange coming from someone who is for all intents and purposes a Professional Fat Chick, but I really don’t care about fat. I barely stop to think about mine so you can be darn sure I don’t think about yours.

What I DO care about is connecting with people who have been told their whole lives that they had to change the way they look to be accepted, popular and loved.

Because that? Is horsehockey. Big, stinky, steaming, gelatinous, horsehockey, with flies and worms and all other gross things I can’t really think too much about because I just ate lunch.

Woo! Okay enough of that rant.

Let’s have some fun, shall we? Tomorrow I’ve got some fab fall clothes I’m really excited about, so today let’s do a Big Question:

Today Miss Plumcake wants to know:

What is the most ridiculous fad diet you have tried or been forced to try?

I think my mother bought every snake oil on the planet and tried it on me. She also tried to wax my fourth-grade moustachio using PARAFFIN, because it’s wax, right? blessherheart, which is neither here nor there except to remind you that if you do screwed up things to your kid, be prepared for her to get at least semi-famous and tell her thousands and thousands of awesome fans alllll about it. ANYHOODLE, I know I was subjected to various shakes and puddings and unnatural things to do with cabbage, but the one that sticks out in my memory was when I was about in fourth grade, and she brought home this little spray. From what I remember now it was bitter grapefruit oil and you were supposed to spray it directly on your tongue every time you were hungry so it would suppress your appetite. Anyone want to guess the end results? That’s right, I found it delicious and to this day bitter, almost mentholated grapefruit, is one of my favorite flavors on earth.

September 15, 2010

Anybody Home?

Filed under: Uncategorized — Miss Plumcake @ 1:48 pm

Hey, what are you people still doing here?

Kidding! I kid because I love! And because after being off my tit on some reaaaaaally fantastic drugs for a week I am back! I’ve missed you so much.

Regular posting will resume tomorrow, but thank you all so much for your kind get-well type things and a super duper thanks to Twistie and Raincoaster for keeping this ship afloat.

Gin and Tonics,

Miss Plumcake

My World is Full of Can

Filed under: Be Super Fantastic — Twistie @ 1:11 pm

I’m sure others of you out there in Big Girl Land have seen Jennifer Hudson’s current Weight Watchers commercial, where she starts off by saying that before she found WW, her world was full of ‘can’t’.

Really, Jennifer?

This is a woman who competed on American Idol, started a singing/acting career and won an Oscar, all while being fat.

As far as I’m concerned, her choice to join WW is just that: a choice. It isn’t one I would make, nor is it one I would particularly encourage, but it’s her choice, she made it, and I honestly do hope that she’s happy with the choice she made.

But here’s the thing, being fat didn’t stop her from living a worthwhile life. It doesn’t stop me from living a worthwhile life. It doesn’t need to stop anyone from living a worthwhile life.

My life is filled with can. I can write. I can laugh. I can cook and bake. I can do craftwork. I can have a happy marriage to a wonderful man. I can fight for social justice. I can entrance children and cats. I can work to overcome my own fears. I can exercise my logic. I can share my joy in life with others. I can sing. I can walk distances. I can swim. I can hold a friend’s hand in a crisis – and have done so even across continents. I can both win and lose gracefully. I can be gloriously stylish on my own terms. I can see beyond my own choices to accept those the people I love make for themselves.

I may never win an Oscar (in fact, I kind of doubt I will since I’ve never been in a major release film), but there’s so much I can be and do.

I can.

I do.

I will.

And honey, I don’t need to reach a particular goal weight to do it.

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