A strong black woman trying to pass as a white southern belle
A group of gay men
A syndicated character written by The Manolo
A mousy girl’s alterego
Before I was outed as an actual living person who’s pretty much exactly what you read here, your Auntie Plumcake was accused of being all of these things, and more. The last thing anyone thought was the person writing about her life, loves, shoes and style was an actual person.
But let me tell you a secret: Years before I took my fruity name and before this blog was even a glimmer in The Manolo’s eye, I willed myself to become Miss Plumcake, and now I am. It illustrates today’s lesson:
People Buy What You Sell.
I wasn’t born especially stylish, I didn’t emerge out of Hubert Givenchy’s forehead a fully formed Glamazon. But when I was younger and realized I didn’t really like who I was, I decided to…adjust. I didn’t fundamentally change who I was any more than adding ginger instead of cinnamon to an apple pie recipes changes the fact it’s an apple pie. And now, my beloved little brother who knows me better than anyone does (Hi little brother! Love you! Thanks for shaving your goatee and not looking like a homeless viking anymore!) says he loves reading my blog because I write just exactly as I talk.
This is different than the idea of “fake it ’til you make it” because it’s not about pretending you’re something you’re not.
It’s about honing the things you have inside you that you like, and graciously ignoring those things that perhaps you don’t love as much, like putting on a flattering outfit, except if you sell an idea long enough, eventually it becomes true and people will accept those things –confidence, beauty, sex appeal, brains– at face value.
So don’t lose hope. If you’re not exactly who you want to be at fifteen –and who is?– don’t change your nature, just rebrand a little. Even if it’s just a tiny glimmer of something inside you, you can fan that flame into a big bonfire of kickassity (is that a word? I don’t think that’s a word. BUT, if I kept using it, soon other people would use it too, and then it would be a word. See? It works everywhere.) Good luck!
Gin and Tonics,