WTF Results!

Is this thing on?

If you remember, the Miss Plumcake Writing Center and Shirtless Footballer Emporium (aka my laptop) suffered great and woeful, or at least very damp, indignities at the pincers of a scorpion last week. Sadly, the situation has not improved and Im only able to post now through a painstaking copy-and-paste process that makes me wish I were more Hemingway and less Faulkner in my word rationing tendencies.

Last week I came across a pair of shoes so ridiculous I just had to know in what situation you, my lovely and generally not mentally-incapacitated audience, would deem them appropriate.

I was a little (okay a lot) surprised to discover several of you thought they were the best thing since sliced vodka, and to those folks I would like to invite a bit of an old sit-and-ponder on the difference between Fashion and Costume. Don’t worry though, we’ve ALL been on the wrong side of sartorial history on occasion.

Best of All pump from Irregular Choice:

 

Truth is, it was more challenging than I expected coming up with just one winner.

I wanted to give it to Rachel for her sound logic:

It’s a trick question. There is literally no time or place, real or fantasy, in which these are acceptable.

 

or Margo A for the most plauisibly realistic:

A costume party where I’m going as a Bowie groupie from 1974.

 

or even Melissa

My brother-in-laws funeral – paired with a very. red. dress.

(because lets face it, if I didn’t, I would probably come come home one day to a faceful of acid and a photo of my beloved pooch Dozer tied up holding a copy of today’s newspaper.)

 

but I had to give it up for our own longtime reader and commenter Daisyj for going above and beyond the call of absolute insanity to offer us this little gem.

Evil supervillain is holding my cat hostage in his hollow-volcano lair, demands that I appear in public in these or he will vaporize the shoe floor at Barneys. I slip them on and stroll through Saint Hippolyta’s home for the completely blind, then burn them and sterilize everything they touched with a 20% bleach solution, just to be sure.

Well played, DaisyJ. I thank you and America thanks you. Now I’m off to see if i can get into Witness Protection. Dozer is beginning to look nervous.

 

Evil supervillain is holding my cat hostage in his hollow-volcano lair, demands that I appear in public in these or he will vaporize the shoe floor at Barneys. I slip them on and stroll through Saint Hippolyta’s home for the completely blind, then burn them and sterilize everything they touched with a 20% bleach solution, just to be sure.

One Response to “WTF Results!”

  1. jason December 30, 2011 at 11:08 pm #

    Gee, that’s a hard one.
    Of course, if you’d posted a shirtless footballer from the Emporium instead, I might have been able to come up with an idea or two that might be appropriate. Or not.

    :)