Our internet friend Johanne literally begs for help!

Francesca, I’m begging you. Help me.

I am short. I am broad. I am muscular, especially in the thighs. And I cannot for the life of me find even one pair of decent opaque matte black tights. Anywhere.

Everything I’ve found so far, online or in the stores, is sized as if everyone who weighs 181 lbs. also is over 5’7″. I’m five-foot-three on a tall day. The few tights I’ve found that have short “Queen” sizes are crap–either too see-through or horribly shiny.

Can you recommend a site for good tights? My inseam is 28″ and I’m a size 14 on the bottom, mostly due to thighs and butt.

Help. I don’t want to go naked this winter.

Many thanks,

Jo

Ayyyy! Indeed, to be the petite girl of over 181 pounds creates a conundrum for the stocking stuffer!

Francesca, who is 5’1″ and weighs over 200 pounds, finds that the Queen sizes fit her OK, usually, but admittedly her weight is in her tummy, not her thighs. This does not help the Johanne.

Francesca’s first thought, for Jo, was to wear knee-hi’s on the bottom of the leg, and thermal or spandex or cotton leggings/long underwear/biking shorts up top. This would work for days one is wearing trousers or a long skirt, but it is not, admittedly, practical for knee-length skirts or for seducing a man.

What is the short-legged, wide-thighed and -butted girl to do?

First, she goes to Talbot’s! Look! Pantyhose in Women’s Petite sizes!

Here is a link to all the Womens Petite hosiery. Johanne will have a ball!

Next we turn to the readers. Where can Jo get opaque, plus-size matte tights for the short girl?

It has come up, here at Manolo for the Big Girl, when we recommend strapless, wide-neckline, or plunging-neckline dresses, that readers do not know where to find a bra to wear with such revealing clothes.

Whitney, who recommended HolyClothing to us, reminds us about Bravissimo, the British bra store which sells “lingerie for big-boobed women” (seriously, that is their tagline). Francesca was pleased to see that they sell strapless and plunging bras, starting at D-cups, all the way up to G-cup. (Elsewhere on the site, bras go up to size K, and there is a nursing bra in an L-cup.)

The bras are pricey (and outside Europe, one must add a $15 shipping fee – ha! revenge for all American sites which do not even ship abroad at all!), but this is not an area where one wishes to skimp.

So now there is no excuse not to look and feel sexy.

Our internet friend Margo sent us a link to an interesting newspaper article about the inadequacies of sports bras:

Dr Scurr said that the design of bras, including sports bras, was unable to cope with the three-dimenional movement which stretched the tissue and caused discomfort. “Bras are designed to support up and down movement,” she said. “We found they move up and down, from side to side, and back and forward. Previous research has only looked at vertical movement, which we found contributes only 50 per cent of the overall movement.

“Breasts move in three dimensions. Current bra design is inadequate and I think it is putting women off exercising. There really are women who want to do exercise but who don’t have the bras to cope. It is only recently that bra design has turned to science. There was no research. It’s like designing a car without first thinking, ‘What is the purpose of this?’ We need to think, why do we need bras? What do we need them to do?”

We Big Girls are painfully (pun intended) aware of the challenges in finding a good over-the-shoulder-boulder-holder which is appropriate for sports. Francesca sincerely hopes that bra manufacturers answer our wrenching pleas!

If you happen to live near one of Avenue’s 500 U.S. locations, please be advised that they are in the midst of their semi-annual sale, with 70 percent off some items in the store, until August 1.

Avenue sells affordable clothing in sizes 14-32. Not all of the prints or styles are to Francesca’s taste, but every so often you find a gem, like this purrrrrfectly sexy black faux wrap dress.

(Miss Plumcake informs us this soft knit number hangs happily in her auxiliary closet reserved solely for LBD’s)

For an evening when you may wear this dress perhaps some extra-pretty lingerie will be called for. Avenue has that as well (15 percent off from their website, not just in the stores), and since this is a family website Francesca has chosen one of the more covering options to show as an example:

No, it is not made of real satin or silk, but then, it is not made for wearing very long.

Happy shopping!

xoxo, Francesca

Ladies! Before we talk about clothes, we must talk about bras. When was the last time you bought a new one? When was the last time you were measured properly to make sure you are wearing the correct size? A better bra will make anything you wear look better. You cannot look 100 percent superfantastic if your “girls” are sagging onto your belly, or if you are constantly pulling up stretched-out straps! So, what I want you to do, right now, is schedule a time to measure yourself, or be measured, and buy yourself a new brassiere that holds you up (underwire required!), proud and strong, and has enough lace in it to tickle the fancy of anyone who sees it (even if that person is just you). And please, no pointies!

If it is in your favorite color, all the better. But remember! The best color for making sure your bra is not visible through your clothes is not white. It is whatever color most closely matches your skin tone. For me, that color is a light beige or ivory. For you, it is perhaps coffee or a gorgeous chocolate brown.

Getting the measurements for a correct fit is not difficult – you can do it yourself, or have a friend help you – but unfortunately, the sites that offer instructions often have conflicting information. For example, according to this site (where I found bras in sizes through 56F), I wear size 48B. But according to the fabulous Bigger Bras, I would wear size 46C. Very confusing. But the point is, I now know to look for a 46 or 48 band in B or C, and to try different styles until I find what works best.

Remember, superfantasticness starts from within, with one’s attitude. It emanates outward, to the lingerie. Only then is it expressed through the clothes that everyone else can see and appreciate. So treat your boobs to a beautiful new bra, and let the superfantasticness begin!